Oh, She’ll Figure it out

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Needless to say I did not sleep well…

2 long days of anger, frustration, and utter disappointment. Managed to resolve a couple of issues and was looking forward to a proposition of solace. But the proposition bailed, and I went to sleep once again angry, frustrated, and utterly disappointed. I went to sleep in a place I did not want to be.

I know I was dreaming, but don’t remember the first 2. Just that I woke up screaming twice. The first time, I screamed “GEEEEEET OOOOUUUUUT!”, the second “STOOOOOP!”

…The 3rd one I remember to, to well…

I was bound, gagged and shackled, then beaten by every person I knew that I let within 2 steps of me. I was dragged by a chain around my neck to a cave with a shallow pit. My best friend said to me; “You don’t understand what really matters. I only want you to be happy.” Then proceeded to throw me into the pit in the cave. My boyfriend looks over the edge and says that he’s going to chill out on YouTube. People  start gathering in front of the cave. “Oh, she’ll figure it out.”  They tell each other; “So just push the button” …

There was and explosion and the walls cave in …

I woke up kicking and punching the walls of my room …

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Left Over Garden

 

I’m always amazed how plants will always find a way to grow. We hack, rip, and litterally eat them alive. Spray them with herbicides, and pave over them. Still they will find a way. I want to go on and on about all that we can learn from plants’ determination to grow, but I wouldn’t be able to spout out anything so deep and life changing that you couldn’t figure it out for yourself.

Now I usually bury my leftovers in a designated compost area in my back garden. That’s a back yard to all my State Side buddies. Every year I get some very interesting things growing. Strange looking yellow cucumber with black seeds, or wonky looking pumpkins … well, I say pumpkins … Almost always get some kind of cross breed potatoes…

But I’ve been lazy for the past several months, and have just dumped the leftover bits and pieces without burying them. … OK, that’s a lie. I’ve been so lazy about it, that it’s my Honey Man Guy that’s been deposing of it. Well, I had a little time the other day and went out to dump the left over bits and pieces and look what I found! 2 cabbages and stalks of celery that refuse to die!

 

UPDATE Monday 23 April 2018:

One of the cabbages have taken root and turning into a tree! 😄

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My 3rd New Years Resolution 2018 Sucks

I did it again… I made another stupid New Years Resolution to write a blog post once a week and so far I’ve utterly failed. It’s the same tired old story. Life, not enough time, work, brain fog, blah, blah, blah… Now there is a new excuse. I’ve lost it. Not that I ever had it. My outlook and perspective is jaded. My flow altered. My sense of creativity is shot and at best plagiarised.

I’ve gone through my blog posts and most of them are about how I failed at New Years Resolutions. And making New Years Resolutions. Why I made this one again? I don’t know!!! It sucks! I’ve become a ranting over middle aged woman! I have joined the club! Meaning that anything that I write will be no different than any other over middle aged ranting woman…

I’m not able to write anything unique or special. All my trials in life are no more interesting than anybody else.  I’m not computer/internet savoy to navigate through all this Word Press malarkey. I can’t afford upgrades. I don’t have a lot of followers. And many of my “friends” are in their own right writers and story tellers, and by some social construct, that makes them better and their writing more interesting than anything that I can produce… So Fuck It…

I’ll just write. I’ll just write whatever, because it isn’t going to make much of a difference to anyone. I don’t have it in me to reek havoc. So no worries on the accidental bits of enlightenment, inspiration or spiral down evoked in anybody who just might take a gander. Again, I’m just another tired, ranting over middle aged  woman. I’ll do what I know. I’ll rant. And then, like the one monkey out of a million monkeys typing at typewriters… computers… I just might write, rant, something that is worth a read.